Archive for the ‘About celebrities’ Category

Liv Tyler: As Long As They Don’t Find Out I’m Se­cret­ly Asian

Moth­er: Both of my daugh­ters are al­lowed to mar­ry Or­lan­do Bloom if they ever want to. That is one gor­geous boy.
Fa­ther: Who’s Or­lan­do Bloom?
Daugh­ter #1: An elf.
Moth­er: No, he’s not.
Daugh­ter #2: Yes, he is — he was Lego­las in the Lord of the Rings.
Fa­ther: The elf was played by a black man?

–Car­oli­na Beach, North Car­oli­na

Their Brains Are in a League of Their Own

Movie crit­ic #1: You know that movie, with Tom Han­ks, where he plays the drunk base­ball play­er? And the women are the play­ers be­cause the men are gone?
Movie crit­ic #2: Where?
Movie crit­ic #3: To war.
Movie crit­ic #2: So the women played base­ball? That was­n’t a movie.
Movie crit­ic #1: You know, the movie has that star that’s on TV. Bette Davis’ daugh­ter.
Movie crit­ic #3: Who?

De­bate goes on for sev­er­al min­utes.

Movie crit­ic #1: Wait, it’s Geena Davis! She’s Bet­ty Davis’ daugh­ter! See the re­sem­b­lence in the eyes?
Movie crit­ic #3: Did­n’t Bet­ty Davis hate Geena be­cause she was tall?
Movie crit­ic #1: Well, she got the part any­way, did­n’t she? Geesh, I wish I could re­mem­ber the name of that movie!

–Nau­set Beach, East­ham, Mass­a­chu­setts